Joke Thread

[Lopaka KaMars]

 

[Oaks 'Between The Hedges']

 

[ZCForge]

 

[glock24shooter]

View attachment 797408

A Glock 19x who the hell does that kid know

 

[Carrera1963]

 

[Oaks 'Between The Hedges']

 

[flyer]

Did you ever wonder why earrings became so popular with men?

A man is at work one day when he notices that his co-worker is wearing an earring.

The man knows his co-worker to be a normally conservative fellow, and is curious about his sudden change in "fashion sense".

The man walks up to him and says, "I didn't know you were into earrings."

"Don't make such a big deal, it's only an earring," he replies sheepishly.

His friend falls silent for a few minutes, but then his curiosity prods him to ask,

"So, how long have you been wearing one?"

"Ever since my wife found it in my truck."

 

[flyer]

One for @cyclerdoug :

You've all heard of the Air Force's ultra-high-security, super-secret base in Nevada, known simply as Area 51.
Well, late one afternoon, the Air Force folks at Area 51 were very surprised when without permission or radio contact, a Cessna landed at their "secret" base.

They immediately impounded the aircraft, handcuffed the pilot and hauled him to an interrogation room.
The pilot's story was that he took off from Vegas, got lost, and spotted the base just as he was about to run out of fuel.

The Air Force started a full FBI-NSA background check on the pilot and locked him up overnight.
By noon the next day, they were finally convinced that the pilot really was lost and wasn't a spy.
They gassed up his airplane, gave him a terrifying "you-did-not-see-a-base" briefing, complete with threats of spending the rest of his life in prison, told him Vegas was that-a-way on such-and-such a heading, and sent him on his way.
However, the next day, to the total disbelief of the Air Force, the same Cessna violated restricted airspace and again plopped down on the long runway at Area 51.
Again, MP's with guns drawn surrounded the plane which this time contained two people.
The same pilot jumped out, with hands-up, laid spread-eagle on the ground and screamed,"Do anything you want to me, but my wife is in the plane and you have to tell her where I was last night !"

 

[cyclerdoug]

@flyer

Outstanding!!!

And absolutely could happen. (The Second landing with the wife).

 

[Lopaka KaMars]