MedusaOblongata
Oakley Beginner
TL/DR: broken arm on Badman. (Where) can I get a new arm?
I like nice sunglasses, but I don't like them that much. I wear sunglasses every day, but most of my life I wore gas station sunglasses. They averaged $10. I was pissed if I had to spend $15. Then I got into discount designer clothes because the chicks dug it. I had a dozen pairs of used eBay Armani, Versace, Diesel, Dolce, etc jeans that I paid $20 or less for, chicks loved taking those pants off of me. Then I saw a pair of Diesel sunglasses used on eBay for $10, which was my price, so I bought them. I got compliments on those sunglasses every single day. This had never happened before. I was sold, but after years of everyday wear, they really wore out. I emailed Diesel to see if they wanted to replace them, but they did not. I may have sprung for $20 sunglasses after that, but they weren't the same. Then I ended up with this chick who had too much money and she bought me a pair of Oakley Jawbones 9 1/2 years ago. They're still my favorite sunglasses, though I did have to replace the lenses a few years ago. The sunglasses outlasted the girl (thank FSM). I totally love these Jawbones. So a few years ago I was on vacation in Texas and wandered into an Oakley store and saw Badmans, and I had a simultaneous emotional and physiological reaction (some will find this redundant). I absolutely had to have them, and I was willing to sacrifice somebody else's goat if that's what it took. But no, what it took instead was $400. It's against my religion to spend $400 on sunglasses (in fact, my car, computer, guns, and one Barbour leather jacket are the only things I own that I've spent more than $400 on (excepting vacations), though there will probably be a leather sewing machine in the $2K range soon). So when I got home from vacation I got online right away looking for these soul mate level Badman sunglasses at a reasonable price. I found a pair on eBay, boxless, slightly used, for $200. I don't even know how or why I bought them, because that's still more than I should spend on sunglasses, especially since I already had one pair, but the half price magic/allure/irrational mathematical homo economicus synapse misfire clicked "Buy" and then it was too late. So I loved these Badmans. Whether they're worse or better man than I am we can't really discuss here due to reasons that also really can't be discussed here. So I loved and wore those Badmans, with compliments from the chicks and smiles on my face and my eyeballs liked them. Then they were in the pocket of my Barbour leather jacket when a heartbreakingly beautiful girl sat on my lap and that's what broke the arm. I didn't cry, but I did make a face. I still have the Jawbones so my eyeballs haven't fallen out, but I sure do like those Badmans. Can I get a new arm? It might not even matter if the color matches, like right and left hubcaps on a car, since nobody will be able to see both at once. I would write more, but I've spent all day and night doing leatherwork, yardwork, electrical work, at the hardware store, cooking magnificently, making the world a better place (in my own special way), and I've got to get to sleep soon because I've got a date in 12 and a half hours, and I have three leather wallets to finish between now and then. I'll make you a wallet for a pair of Badmans if that's fair, I've got some elephant, alligator, lizard, shark, and ostrich leg leather.
TL/DR: broken arm on Badman. (Where) can I get a new arm?
Thanking you for your patience, consideration, and assistance,
I remain,
Jason aka MedusaOblongata
MedusaOblongata@gmail.com
I like nice sunglasses, but I don't like them that much. I wear sunglasses every day, but most of my life I wore gas station sunglasses. They averaged $10. I was pissed if I had to spend $15. Then I got into discount designer clothes because the chicks dug it. I had a dozen pairs of used eBay Armani, Versace, Diesel, Dolce, etc jeans that I paid $20 or less for, chicks loved taking those pants off of me. Then I saw a pair of Diesel sunglasses used on eBay for $10, which was my price, so I bought them. I got compliments on those sunglasses every single day. This had never happened before. I was sold, but after years of everyday wear, they really wore out. I emailed Diesel to see if they wanted to replace them, but they did not. I may have sprung for $20 sunglasses after that, but they weren't the same. Then I ended up with this chick who had too much money and she bought me a pair of Oakley Jawbones 9 1/2 years ago. They're still my favorite sunglasses, though I did have to replace the lenses a few years ago. The sunglasses outlasted the girl (thank FSM). I totally love these Jawbones. So a few years ago I was on vacation in Texas and wandered into an Oakley store and saw Badmans, and I had a simultaneous emotional and physiological reaction (some will find this redundant). I absolutely had to have them, and I was willing to sacrifice somebody else's goat if that's what it took. But no, what it took instead was $400. It's against my religion to spend $400 on sunglasses (in fact, my car, computer, guns, and one Barbour leather jacket are the only things I own that I've spent more than $400 on (excepting vacations), though there will probably be a leather sewing machine in the $2K range soon). So when I got home from vacation I got online right away looking for these soul mate level Badman sunglasses at a reasonable price. I found a pair on eBay, boxless, slightly used, for $200. I don't even know how or why I bought them, because that's still more than I should spend on sunglasses, especially since I already had one pair, but the half price magic/allure/irrational mathematical homo economicus synapse misfire clicked "Buy" and then it was too late. So I loved these Badmans. Whether they're worse or better man than I am we can't really discuss here due to reasons that also really can't be discussed here. So I loved and wore those Badmans, with compliments from the chicks and smiles on my face and my eyeballs liked them. Then they were in the pocket of my Barbour leather jacket when a heartbreakingly beautiful girl sat on my lap and that's what broke the arm. I didn't cry, but I did make a face. I still have the Jawbones so my eyeballs haven't fallen out, but I sure do like those Badmans. Can I get a new arm? It might not even matter if the color matches, like right and left hubcaps on a car, since nobody will be able to see both at once. I would write more, but I've spent all day and night doing leatherwork, yardwork, electrical work, at the hardware store, cooking magnificently, making the world a better place (in my own special way), and I've got to get to sleep soon because I've got a date in 12 and a half hours, and I have three leather wallets to finish between now and then. I'll make you a wallet for a pair of Badmans if that's fair, I've got some elephant, alligator, lizard, shark, and ostrich leg leather.
TL/DR: broken arm on Badman. (Where) can I get a new arm?
Thanking you for your patience, consideration, and assistance,
I remain,
Jason aka MedusaOblongata
MedusaOblongata@gmail.com